


The Curious Case of Minerva Fitz-Simmons

by TheForestAndTheBadger



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Family, FitzSimmons adopt a cat, Fluff, How Do I Tag This, also a babyfic in later chapters, and FitzSimmons finally getting a happy ending, basically tooth-rotting fluff, by accident
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-31
Updated: 2017-06-08
Packaged: 2018-05-30 07:04:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 11,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6413782
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheForestAndTheBadger/pseuds/TheForestAndTheBadger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A married FitzSimmons adopt a stray cat, and their lives get 100% cuter. Thats it. A fluffy story about a cat, and everything that follows after.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Leo Fitz struggled to hold back the panic that was bubbling inside his chest, as he stood looking down at a dead body.

He, Mack and Lincoln had been sent to intercept a Hydra agent; to apprehend and detain the man for questioning. Unfortunately, Lincoln had shocked the man with his electrical powers, hoping to just stun him, but instead causing the hydra agent’s pacemaker to fritz out. They hadn’t even known he had an implant. Lincoln had dropped to his knees in horror, giving his enemy CPR and zapping his chest at regular intervals to try and restart his pulse, but all to no avail.

Now the three men stood in horrified silence, wondering what step to take next.

“I’m a doctor. I’m supposed to heal people. I just broke my Hippocratic oath” Lincoln whispered weakly.

“I know you are beating yourself up over this, Sparkplug, so I’m not going to say it’s your fault” Mack said, but Fitz could tell he was peeved that their target was dead. He sighed heavily. “I’m just not looking forward to trying to explain this to Coulson.”

Lincoln groaned, and gave the body an experimental zap, to see if it helped. It didn’t.

Fitz kept his eyes firmly on his feet. The proximity of the body was making him a bit queasy, and he knew they had blown the mission. He focused on regulating his breathing, and not becoming lightheaded, before something on the screen of his tablet captured his attention.

“Hey, guys-“he angled the tablet so they could see. “There is someone-something else here.” A small red blob on his screen indicated that one of his D.W.A.R.V.E.S had picked up another heat signature.

“That’s too small to be-“Mack wondered aloud.

“It looks like…a cat?” Lincoln suggested.

Fitz cautiously made his way towards the room containing the red blob, listening for any signs of danger. He opened a door to find the living quarters of the now deceased Hydra Agent. It was obviously a bachelor pad, with crumpled sheets thrown across a futon, milk crate as a night stand, and piles of paperwork stacked under old Chinese food cartons.  
Mack started thumbing through the papers, nodding to himself.

“Might not be a lost cause after all. Lucky for us that this guy was a slob, there is a lot of good info here.”

Fitz put down his tablet, and crouched on his hands and knees on the grimy concrete floor, peering under the bed.

Two green eyes reflected light back at him, as the creature cowered further into the corner.

“It _is_ a cat.” He softly clicked his tongue, trying to coax the frightened animal out from it’s hiding spot. Slowly, the cat crawled towards his outstretched hand. It was a tiny thing, pale orange stripes under a layer of dust, large green eyes dilated as it tentatively sniffed at Fitz’s fingers and then to his surprise, pushed its head against his hand in greeting.

Taking a quick look around the room, he could now see details of the cat’s habitation. There was a folded blanket in the corner, with a furry indent from where it slept. There was a ragged catnip mouse by the fridge. There even was a Polaroid of the cat held to the fridge with a magnet.

“Shit.” Fitz swore, guilt welling up in his throat. “I think we just killed this cat’s owner.”


	2. Chapter 2

Fitz stepped off of the jet, the cat curled up comfortably inside his zipped jacket. The first thing he saw was Jemma, a relieved smile breaking across her face, stepping forward with open arms for an embrace.

“Hey,” He murmured into her hair, as she wrapped her arms around his torso. “I have a lot to tell you.”

Jemma stepped back, a confused look on her face. 

“Why is your chest all lumpy?” she asked.

The cat poked its head out of Fitz’s collar, its ears brushing the bottom of his chin.

“Leopold Fitz-Simmons, Why the HELL do you have a cat in your jacket?” Jemma was trying to keep her voice calm, but Leo knew that just meant that inside she was screaming.

“I was going to explain!” He held his hands up, and the cat slipped a bit, its hind paws sticking out from the bottom of the garment.

Mack stepped up beside Fitz and Jemma, breaking their conversation.

“”Hey, Turbo, we’re off to debriefing with Coulson.” He pointed at the cat. “You might want to drop that beast off somewhere before, though.”

Fitz looked pleadingly at Jemma. “I promise I’ll explain everything. Can I put the cat in our bathroom, just for a little while?”

Jemma stared into the distance for a moment, as if gathering her strength, before nodding in resignation.

“Yes, put the stray cat you found in our bathroom. Put down some newspapers though? I don’t feel like mopping up cat wee.”

“Thank you,” Fitz breathed, and was just about to rush past her, when she caught his sleeve.

“Hey. I’m glad you’re back safe.” She said softly, kissing him. “I know I seemed angry but..”

“I know.” He replied. She worried about him every time he went on a mission, even if he never put himself in danger’s way. The cat squirmed a bit, breaking him from his reverie.

“I’ll see you soon!” He called, as he supported the cat with his hands so it wouldn’t jostle too much, and nearly jogged to his and Jemma’s quarters.

Coulson had given him and Jemma their own rooms as a wedding gift, five months ago. A large bedroom with an en suite bathroom as well as an open concept kitchenette/living area were the closest they would have to their own apartment without actually leaving the premises of the base.

Fitz grabbed some towels from the linen closet on his way to their bathroom, still cradling the cat to his chest with one arm. The small beast was surprisingly calm, looking around with wide eyes. Fitz folded the towels into a comfortable cat bed on the bathroom floor, before laying down some newspapers in case the cat had to pee.

“I’m sorry this is all I’ve got for you.” He said to the cat, as he filled up a bowl with water from the tap. “I’ll get you some better things soon, I promise.” The cat jumped up onto the toilet, and then the edge of the sink, looking at Fitz with solemn eyes, before curiously batting it’s paw under the stream of water.

Fitz chuckled at the cat’s antics, before he checked his watch and gasped.

“I gotta go! Be good.”


	3. Chapter 3

After the debriefing meeting with Coulson, Fitz was exhausted. It had been more draining that he had expected, and he hurried towards his rooms, suddenly wanting nothing more than to flop on the bed and take a nap.

That all changed, however, when he heard Jemma’s soft voice coming from the bathroom. He knocked gently, before letting himself in.

Jemma was sitting cross-legged on the floor, trying to coax the kitten from its hiding spot behind the toilet with a piece of chicken.

“Shh!” Jemma warned. “I’m trying to let the cat get used to me. She spooks easily, poor thing.” She paused. “How did your meeting with Coulson go?”

It had gone as well as expected, which meant not well, and Fitz shrugged half-heartedly.

“A bit shit, to be honest. Don’ really feel like talking about it.” He admitted, joining Jemma on the floor. “Tell me about your day, instead?” He pressed a kiss to her hairline, to let her know all was well, and she hummed in contentment.

She proceeded to detail the mundanities of her day, from what she was working on in the lab, to humorous anecdotes about the lab techs. Her soft voice and the familiar sound of scientific terms falling easily from her tongue soothed him, and he rested his head on her shoulder.

As Jemma talked, the cat became more accustomed to their presence, and crept closer and closer, until it nibbled the scrap of chicken from Jemma’s fingertips, and even approaching the bowl of chicken and rice she had gathered from the kitchen.

“There we go,” Jemma cooed, watching the small beast start to eat. “She’s such a sweetie.”

“She?”

Jemma wrinkled her nose in amusement. 

“Weren’t you listening? Yeah, she’s a little girl cat. Did you forget that my sister is a vet, and that I grew up on a farm?” She teased. “I know how to tell what sex a cat is.”

“Hey, there.” Fitz wiggled his socked foot playfully at the striped kitten, and she pounced on him, worrying the hem of his jeans between tiny needle teeth. 

“I was thinking of the name…Hazel.” Jemma ventured, and Fitz looked at her in surprise.

“Yeah? You were thinking of names?” Did that mean she was wanting to keep the cat, then? He hoped so. He already had grown fond of her.

“Yeah. I mean…” She looked at Fitz, and for once he couldn’t tell what was going on inside her head.

“I already did some scans.” Jemma blurted. ‘While you were with Coulson. I-I did some x rays and looked for microchips or trackers or anything that that could make this kitten a Hydra weapon.” She exhaled shakily. “But she’s not. She’s 100% flesh and bone. And I think I’m already falling in love.”

Fitz was silent, overwhelmed by Jemma’s confessions. He stroked his thumb up and down her shoulder as he grappled with the idea that Jemma had been afraid he had brought a Hydra weapon into the base. And he could have, too. 

He laughed once, at the bitter thought that they now could view a kitten as a potential threat.  
“Fitz?” Jemma’s voice was small.

“I hate that you even had to think about that. On top of every other threat we face, that a tiny baby animal could be weaponized? Fuck.”

“Hey, hey.” Jemma shifted, until she was almost sitting in his lap. “That is how we work. You are so kind and sensitive, Leo. You are the one who brings home a cat because you can’t bear to leave it alone to fend for itself. And I love that, and I love you for it.” She rested her hands on either side of his face, so he looked straight at her. “And that leaves me to be rational, and plan for the worst. You’re the heart, and I’m the head.”

“You shouldn’t have to though.” Fitz protested. “You shouldn’t have to always be worrying and looking for the danger. It is going to tear you apart, Jem.”

Jemma tilted her head back, swallowing back tears. A tiny mew from beside her foot distracted her, and she looked down to see the cat tentatively pawing at her leg.

“Hey, Baby.” Jemma giggled, forgetting that seconds before she had been on the verge of tears.

The cat meowed again, and bravely crawled onto Jemma’s lap, tiny claws digging into her jeans.

“Fitz!” Jemma breathed. “I think she likes me.”

“Why wouldn’t she?” he murmured, and together they watched as the pale orange cat curled up on Jemma’s lap and started to purr.


	4. Chapter 4

The next day, Fitz and Jemma woke early, plotting out their day over steaming cups of tea, and feet touching each other's underneath the breakfast table.

Jemma went to Coulson, requesting that she and Fitz could take a day off to leave the base, and visit a vet, and a pet store. He was a little confused, but agreed readily, once Jemma explained about the cat situation.

She walked back to her rooms deep in thought about how to convert a cardboard box into a secure cat carrier, to find Fitz sprawled out on his stomach on the floor.

He had somehow procured a bright animation of koi swimming onto the screen of his tablet. The cat sat primly, watching the fish undulate to and from, before swiftly pouncing on the tablet, and tapping the screen with tiny paws. 

Jemma giggled, and knelt on the carpet beside Fitz, tapping the screen with a fingertip to to make the animated fish respond.

Fitz rolled over onto his back, looking up at Jemma. 

“I was thinking we should start thinking of names? I keep calling her ‘cat’ but that’s no good.” He said.

Jemma studied the cat, gently picking her up, so she could hold it to her chest for closer inspection.

“Hey, sweetie. What is your name?” Her voice already shifting into the higher range she reserved only for animals or babies. “Are you a….Honey? Is your name……Amber?”

“Amber? Hmmm, what about Whiskey?”

“Fitz, I refuse to name our first pet as a married couple after alcohol. No.”

“Apricot!” Fitz suggested. “And we could call her Apri-cat.” He grinned at his own pun.

“Ugh, Fitz!”

“Ok, ok.” He huffed out a breath, as he thought. “Named after someone in a show we like? She’s ginger. What about Amy? Or Donna?”

“She’s not a Donna.” Jemma protested, laughing. “What about….Oh my goodness. What about Minerva, after Minerva McGonagall.”

“I wouldn’t have immediately thought…” Fitz pondered, but Jemma could see that he was actually considering it. “For some reason it really suits her.” 

“And we could call her Minnie? Because she is so tiny, she is miniature?” Jemma clicked her tongue at the cat, who has scrambled out of her arms and now was playing with the fish on Fitz’s tablet again.

“Minnie? Minerva.” She tried out the name, feeling it on her tongue, and much to her delight, the cat perked up her ears at the sound of her voice. ‘Oh, do you like that name?” 

Fitz watched Jemma playing with the newly minted Minnie, his heart full, and a small smile on his face. Jemma noticed him, and gave him a questioning look.

“What?” She asked, her voice half laugh, half worry.

“I’m just…happy?” Fitz admitted. “This is nice. Domestic.”

Jemma wrinkled her nose in a smile. “The three of us. We’re a little family now.”

“As long as we don’t turn into those pet owners who refer to themselves as Mommy and Daddy to their pets.” Fitz said. “Isn’t that right, Minnie? I’m not your Dad.”

Jemma burst into another laughter, and Fitz grinned at her, still amazed that he was the one to make her laugh, to watch her hair spill down her back as she threw her head back in amusement. Still a little stunned that he got to wake up next to her every morning.

“What?” She asked again, still chuckling a bit, when she noticed him gazing at her.

Fitz had never been good at articulating his feelings into words, unable to distill the vastness of his affections for Jemma into coherent sentences, so he just leaned forward, and hoped his kisses could convey them instead.


	5. Chapter 5

While Jemma took Minnie to the vet, Fitz was doing his best to navigate the aisles of the nearest pet store.

The very first thing he had done, was picked up one of those ‘Cat Care for Beginners’ books, and after a cursory flip through, found the page displaying a checklist of basic cat necessities.

Jemma may have grown up in a household familiar with cats, but Fitz’s mum was allergic to the small beasts, so the only pet Fitz had had as a kid was a betta fish.

Feeling slightly dazed by all the new information in his hands, and the visual stimuli surrounding him, Fitz dropped the heavy paperback book into his basket before continuing on his search.

He was fine with finding objects such as grooming brushes, small ceramic food and water bowls, and he confidently selected a number of colorful toys he thought Minnie would find fun to play with. 

He tested the plushness and density of various cat beds with his hand, cocking his head to the side as he debated which color schemes and patterns would fit best with his and Jemma’s home décor. Tans and browns would fit with the neutral theme of the base, but what about the one with the pattern of fish in a variety of blues? Or the one in a grey herringbone? He finally chose a bed with a pale fleecy top, and emerald green fronds in a lush jungle pattern for the side panels. He smiled at the thought of Minnie curled up in the bed, like the worlds tiniest tiger.

 

In fact, Fitz was feeling like the whole shopping trip was going surprisingly well, until he turned down the food aisle. He was immediately overwhelmed by the wide variety of brands, flavours and formulas, and was unsure where to start. He looked around, searching for an employee to help him, but they all seemed to be elsewhere in the store. With a sigh, he turned back to his task, and grabbed a bag off the shelf at random, looking at the back, hoping the writing would give him some directions. 

This was worse than the time he went on an emergency tampon run for Jemma, and ended up on the phone with her in the pharmacy aisle, as she patiently guided him through all the options until he found the type she wanted.

Jemma.

Fitz pulled his phone out of his back pocket, thumb hovering as he debated whether or not to contact her. No! He was a capable grown man, with an above average intellect. He wouldn’t let a little thing like cat food fluster him so easily. He squared his shoulders and squinted closer at the bag he was holding. He could do this.

 

Jemma’s phone rang, Fitz’s contact picture lighting up from where the phone was attached to the dashboard of the SUV. She pressed the speaker button, before focusing again on the road.

“What’s going on?”

“Ugh, Jemma. I have no idea what kind of cat food to buy for Minnie, there are so many options! There is kitten food and cat food, and I honestly don’t even know how old Minnie even is! Like, who even makes these rules? Oooh, this one’s for wee cats. But this one is for cats a bit older.” Fitz’s Scottish brogue increased with his stress levels and Jemma bit back a grin at the mental image of her husband standing flustered in the cat food aisle.

“Fitz, it’s okay! The vet had, like a whole shelf of food and I bought some special stuff there that she recommended, because Minnie’s a bit underweight.”

“Oh.” Fitz exhaled. “well that’s good. Although I’ve been stressin’ ou’ over nothing then.” He paused. “Minnie is okay, though, right?”

“Minnie is fine. She got a physical, and is actually very healthy.” Jemma smiled. “She got all her vaccinations and a de-wormer, just to be safe.”

“ Oh good." he repeated. "I don’t know why I feel so protective over this cat. I love her so much, already."

Maybe because you feel guilty over contributing to the death of her former owner?” Jemma teased gently, before realizing how tone-deaf that joke was. “Not that it was in any way your fault, Fitz. I was just-“

“It’s ok, Jem.” His voice was soft, and she could hear him smiling. “I know you meant no harm.”

There was a moment of quiet on the line, and Jemma felt her heart swell in appreciation for the kind, gentle man she married, and their easy connection that Daisy loved to refer to as their ‘psychic link’. She chuckled, and the soft huff was the only sound between them, before Fitz spoke again.

“So, you’re on your way to pick me up, right? Because I’ve got a huge container of cat litter that’ll probably need two people to lift it into the car, and an entire cat tree. You know, those scratching post things with multiple levels for the cat to climb on? I got one of those too.”

Jemma gave a commiserating look to Minnie, whose carrier was securely held to the seat with the seatbelt. The cat simply blinked at her with large celery-colored eyes.

“Ugh, Fitz!” she tried to sound stern, but a grin kept pulling at the corners of her mouth. “Okay. We’re on our way.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like this was a bit of a fluffy filler chapter? i really wanted to write it, which is why i included it, but the next chapter will start getting into the plot more, and things will start moving along. I hope you enjoy! Please leave feedback! <3


	6. Chapter 6

_Four Months Earlier_

A small smile played across Jemma’s face as she noticed Fitz curled up on the couch, a large scrapbook splayed open across his lap. The book was a wedding gift from both of their mums; a joint endeavor as the two women compiled and copied old photos from their own albums and collections.

Between them, they had rounded up hundreds of photos of Leo and Jemma, ranging from early infancy, through childhood and up until graduation. They had somehow made duplicates of all the photos, before archiving them in a neat leather-bound scrapbook. The book had quickly become one of the couple’s favorite wedding gifts, and it had gained a spot of honor on their new coffee table.

“I’m surprised you aren’t bored of looking at us yet,” she lightly teased.

“How could I be bored?” Fitz responded. “Look at how cute we were!” He held up the book so Jemma could see the pages in mention. She crossed the room the curl up beside him on the couch, curling her chilly feet under her body.

Indeed, as children they both had been heart-wrenchingly adorable. Fitz' hair had started out white blond, and curled up from his scalp like duckling feathers. He grinned at the camera, dressed head to toe in tartan.

Jemma cooed over the photo, until Leo eventually turned the page, and they both started giggling at a school picture of herself circa first grade, smiling wide to display her missing front teeth.

The two of them spent the better part of an hour poring over their childhoods together, before Fitz stopped and looked seriously at Jemma.

“Do you ever find it weird that there was this entire chunk of our lives that…we just we never shared? We have heard so many stories about each other’s childhoods that I feel like I was there, but sometimes I forget that we weren’t best friends growing up.”

Jemma hummed in agreement. “We’ve spent more time together than we ever did apart.” She wrinkled her nose. “I mean, lots of couples don’t even find their partner until they are in their twenties. We met when we were just teenaged babies. That gives us quite the head start, don’t you think?”

“And its not like I’ve missed out on too much, right? Between the two of us , we pretty much know everything about each other.”

“Wait, what?” Jemma laughed incredulously. “Babe. You don’t know everything about me.”

Fitz scoffed. “Really? Jemma. I know a lot about you. I know everything you are allergic to. I know that you love baking, and make gingersnaps when you are happy, but brownies when you are sad and meringues when you are angry.”

He threaded his fingers through hers, eyes going soft with affection. Jemma nestled her head against his shoulder, and breathed in his comforting, familiar scent. There was nowhere else she would rather be that beside her best friend in the universe, who was now her husband.

Fitz kept going. “I know that despite your amazing stomach around cat livers and human brains, you have never been able to sit through an entire horror movie. I know that your favorite book as a kid was A Wrinkle in Time, and that was what made you fall in love with the idea of a big country house with a built in science lab.”

“Oh yes, the Murry House.”

As an only child, Jemma had longed for a family dynamic that mirrored the way the fictional family cared for each other.

Her parents loved her, of course, but they didn’t understand her the way that she wanted, and sometimes Jemma feared that her intelligence and constant questions created a chasm between her and her well-meaning but often confused parents.

Some nights she would dream that she was a member of the fictional family, and would work alongside her mother, Mrs. Murry in the old stone dairy that was a converted lab, and for the duration of the dream, she was filled with a sense of home that left her aching and lonely when she woke up.

Jemma gasped lightly at the touch of Fitz' hand on her arm, jerking her back to reality.

“Where did you go?” He asked. He had recognized the look on her face, of her drifting deep in thought. He had trailed off of his litany of things he knew about her once he had realized that she wasn’t listening anymore.

“What you said about A Wrinkle in Time…it reminded me of something I have been wanting to talk to you about.” She admitted.

“The book?” Fitz was confused. He wracked his memory for what the story was about. He had never actually read the novel, but had heard Jemma talk about it often enough during their Academy years. Time and space travel, wasn’t it? A tesseract, strange planets, and mysterious beings. Cold fear swept through him. What was Jemma going to reveal? Some repressed memory of her time on the blue planet? He moved the scrapbook from his lap to the coffee table, shifting slightly so he could face her head-on.

Jemma took a deep breath, then let the words spill out before she gave herself the chance to hesitate and hold back.

“It reminded me about my dreams of moving to a lovely old house with a lab, and in the books, the family has four kids and...That is starting to be part of my dream now. Not that I want four children, per say, but just in general.” She paused, and tried to gauge Leo’s reaction. He had a slightly dazed look in his eyes, like his brain was catching up to what he had just heard, and his eyes were wide, but after a moment, nodded for her to continue. “But we’ve never really talked about it, have we? I don’t even know how you feel about having a baby.” She finished.

“You want to have a baby?” He repeated, weakly. He was overcome with relief that her topic wasn’t something more otherworldly, and he kissed her knuckles, which he had wrapped in his own shaking hands. “I guess we haven’t had that particular conversation yet, now that I think about it.”

“Do you?” Jemma asked softly.

Fitz imagined a tiny boy with his tawny curls and Jemma’s amber eyes, and a girl with forget-me not blue eyes and the same dark hair as her mother. He thinks about waking up next to Jemma and pushing her shirt up over the curve of her pregnant belly so he could kiss it good-morning. He began to wonder what it would feel like to hold the soft weight of his sleeping child in his arms.

He cleared his throat, which suddenly felt full of tears. “Yeah, Jem’. Of course.” And then all of a sudden she was crying too, and stroking her thumb across his wet cheeks. “Of course I would want to have a baby with you. Yes.”

She giggled wetly, and swiped at her eyes with her shirt sleeves.

”How long have you been thinking about this?” To be honest, he did feel a little bit hurt that she hadn’t shared this with him sooner. Did she think he wouldn’t be excited? Did she think that he wouldn’t want to be a dad?

“A couple months or so?” She admitted. “Ever since things with Shield started settling down.”

After the fallout of the latest Shield mission gone wrong, she and Fitz had withdrawn themselves from field missions for a while, and devoted themselves to working in their lab. They had been through enough, and they needed time to heal from their traumas without having to worry about when the next one would come. There was something peaceful about being barely an arm’s length away from each other nearly all the time, and they began to lapse into their old easy style of conversation, reading each other’s thoughts and finishing each other’s sentences.

“I slowly felt like I was able to breathe again.” She continued. “And I was actually sleeping, and going to therapy, and stopped feeling so, so scared. I realized that I had been afraid that anything good was going to be taken away from me. I stopped feeling like the world was going to end, and I let myself start believing in a future.”

Fitz made a soft noise. He also had felt the same way, suffocated with fear, constantly anticipating the next bad thing to happen to him or worse, the people he cared about. He had healed alongside Jemma, and although memories would always be there, time had washed and diluted them, taking away their sharp sting. Nightmares had become less frequent, but even when they did occur, there were arms to be held in, and a chest to lay ones head on, until heartbeats calmed and synchronized.

“I still can’t help but think,” Jemma said, her voice low, “That maybe I’m foolish for even thinking about bringing a child into this world. I mean, Shield is no place to raise a family.”

“Then we can leave,” Fitz declared, taking her hands. Jemma’s eyes grew large at his words, and something like hope glimmered in their amber depths. “We can leave this place, and go somewhere safe, where no one knows us and no one can hurt us.”

“You would be willing to leave Shield, for me? For our family?”

“Of course. I followed you here as a young kid, terrified to go into the field, but more afraid of losing you. I would follow you to the ends of the earth if you asked me to.”

“What have I ever done to deserve you?” She kissed him, before pulling back, and searching his face.

“Are you unhappy here? Do you want to leave, and are just staying here for me?”

He shook his head. “I’ve never been happier, Jem’.”

Then she was crying again, but smiling, and curled up into him, nestling her head on his shoulder. Fitz ran one hand up and down her back, letting his fingers catch in her hair, which had grown long again.

“I would like to stay then, for now at least.” She said after a few minutes of comfortable silence. “The Inhuman formula I’m working on, I want to see it through.”

“That’s fine with me.”

“But if we want, we can start working on that other thing.” She hinted, and Leo gaped a bit, as he tried to figure out if she had just implied what he thought she had.

“The….baby thing?” he ventured.

Jemma laughed, and responded by kissing him deeply, tugging at his shirt collar.

“Yes. The baby thing.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who re-read A Wrinkle in Time and thought of little Jemma loving the heck out of it?  
> Also this got kind-of angsty at the end, whoops.  
> Next chapter is all plotted out, and will be up soon!  
> Thank you for all the lovely responses i have gotten to this work! I love that you guys like it :3


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Content warning for mention of vomiting.

_Present Day_

Jemma woke to the sound of the shower running, and Fitz's muffled voice singing to himself. She squinted at her bedside clock and wondered why her husband was awake so early. Usually she was the early bird and he was the one burying himself under the covers, but their roles had been reversed, and Jemma took advantage of his absence to pull the entire duvet around her and snuggling back into the pillows, to get a few more moments of sleep before she was forced to face the day.

Minnie had noticed Jemma stirring, and upon finding that her person was conscious, vaulted onto the bed and picked her way across the terrain of the duvet. Minnie arrived at Jemma’s face purring valiantly, and bumped her face against Jemma’s chin in affection. The small cat nosed at the edge of the duvet, before burrowing under, to curl up on Jemma’s stomach like a fuzzy hot water bottle. Jemma patted the lump of Minnie from above the duvet, slipping back into her half-sleep limbo.

Fitz came out of their en-suite bathroom, a towel wrapped around his hips, and another tousling his curls, which he had let grow longish again, mainly because Jemma loved them so. She said they reminded her of when they had first met.

He smiled affectionately at the sight of Jemma curled up in the very center of the bed, her dark hair splayed across her pillow, and one hand resting on a lump in the blankets, which by the purring emanating from, he deduced was Minnie.

He quickly dressed, and perched on Jemma’s side of the mattress, brushing her hair behind one ear and kissing her. His stubble brushed her cheek and she wrinkled her nose happily.

“Good Morning,” She murmured sleepily.

“How are you feeling?” Fitz asked.

Over the past few days, Jemma had been sick, and spent her days either huddled in bed with a hot water bottle or hunched over the toilet, vomiting. Despite Fitz's squeamishness, he had been there to rub her back, hold her hair away from her face, and raid the communal pantry for saltine crackers and ginger ale.

“Better,” Jemma said truthfully, despite the fact that her body still ached and there was a strange metallic taste on her tongue. But at least she hadn’t woken up that morning gripped by nausea, so in that regard, she was feeling better.

She noticed that Fitz was already dressed for the day and sat up in bed, looking at him questioningly.

“Where are you going, so early?”

She tried to keep the hurt out of her voice, but mornings were their time, because some days they barely even saw each other during the day, and often at night they were too tired to do anything but fall asleep together.

The hour between when their alarms went off and when they were expected to be anywhere was a sacred time for them. Time for them to eat breakfast in their tiny kitchen, reading the news on their tablets, feet gently touching under the table. Some mornings there was sex, and they barely had time left over to get dressed, and other days it was his hand acting up so that he couldn’t shave his own face, and Jemma had to help him get dressed, while softly encouraging him that a setback didn’t negate his recovery. Jemma had thought that it was agreed that this was their time, and their alone.

“Radcliffe,” Fitz said by way of explanation. “He sent me a text at 6:30, can you believe that? He said he needs me to come in and look at something.”

“Tell him no!” Jemma cried. “He can wait until a decent hour. It’s not even 7, Leo. He doesn’t have a monopoly on you.”

“I know, Jem. It’s just…It’s important.”

Jemma bit back her words, instead letting them stew and swirl inside her. _More important than what, Leo?_ She knew she was being irrational, and it didn’t mean that he didn’t love her or not want to spend time with her, but knowing that didn’t remove the hot sting of hurt in her chest. If they couldn’t commit to spending a single hour of their mornings solely together, would life chip away at them, until they could barely spend any time with each other? Couldn’t Fitz have said, _No, I’ll see you in an hour_ , instead of running off at Radcliffe’s every demand?

She brushed her hair behind her ears and nodded, unable to look at Fitz for fear of crying.

“Yeah, no, of course. It _must_ be important.”

“Jem’, don’t be like this,” Fitz softly pleaded. “He wouldn’t have asked me if it wasn’t urgent.” He leaned forward to kiss her, but at the last second, changed his trajectory from her lips and kissed her forehead instead. “I’ll see you later, ok?”

Jemma had been expecting a kiss on the mouth, so when she felt his lips on her forehead, something inside her broke. The gesture was detached and impersonal, the kind of kiss you gave a friend or child.

“Fitz.” The use of his ‘old’ name tasted strange and bitter on her tongue. Jemma reached out and grabbed his hand, even as he was walking away, and pulled him back for a proper kiss. She lingered, fingertips gently digging against his stubbled cheeks, and it was him who pulled away first.

“I’ll see you later,” He repeated, and left, the door clicking shut behind him.

Jemma pulled her knees up to her chest, and cried, muffling her sobs with her hands.

Logically, she knew she might be overreacting, but still it _hurt._ There was an awful ache in her chest, and the old fear of losing him, _again_.

Minnie crawled out from under the covers, and looked up at Jemma in concern. Jemma picked her up and cradled her to her chest, and Minnie licked a tear from where it threatened to drop from Jemma’s jaw.

Eventually, Jemma’s tears stopped and her breathing slowed. She dragged herself out of bed, and dropping her clothes in a heap, showered in scalding hot water.

It was when she was dressing, pulling on her bra that she realized that her breasts were heavy and painful to the touch. She held them gingerly as she wondered why they would be that way, when a thought hit her like a train. She gasped and her hand flew up to cover her mouth as she ran through the events of the past few weeks. The nausea and vomiting, her poor memory, her mood swings…

She threw on the rest of her clothes and locking the door behind her, hurried to the lab.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! 1000 apologies for saying that this chapter would be up shortly and...*ahem* that not happening. I can't promise as to the frequency of future updates, but please know i am committed to this story and i have put far too much time and effort into it to even abandon it! :D Also i have split what i have written into 3 new chapters, because y'all deserve more than one chapter at a time from me, tbh.
> 
> (Also, i changed my username bc my old one was the same as a bunch of my other social media, which i have a lot of family and school friends on, whom i dont necessarily want to find out that i write fic lol)


	8. Chapter 8

May walked by the lab, and as she usually did, glanced through the large glass windows. Normally, at this early hour, the lab would be deserted, but today the lights were on and a solitary figure moving around within.

May pushed the door open, and made her way over, being conscious to make small noises to alert of her approach. She often moved completely silently, and she found that despite its efficiency, it often resulted in spooking people and causing them to drop whatever they were hold, and she didn’t want that, especially in the setting of a lab.

“Good Morning, Jemma.” She leant against a desk across from the younger woman.

Jemma looked up from where she was preparing a blood sample, and smiled. “Morning, May.” She paused. “What are you doing here?” She asked, but not unkindly.

May noticed with dismay that Jemma's eyes were puffy, as if she had recently been crying, but had done her best to cover it up.

“Just…usually you aren’t in here so early.” She looked around. “Where’s Fitz?”

Jemma made a small noise and looked back at her work. “He was called away to do something with Radcliffe.” She said shortly. May picked up enough from Jemma’s tense shoulders and the furrow between her brows not to push the topic further.

May stood in silence for a moment, unsure whether to try and keep talking to Jemma or just leave and pretend she had never been there. The two women had created a sort of Mentor relationship over the past few months, and would periodically practice fighting together, with the older woman teaching Jemma how to better protect herself. In turn, Jemma and May had developed a friendship, learning each other’s sense of humors and slowly trusting each other enough to share things from their pasts with each other.

“What are you working on?” May ventured.

Jemma took a deep breath before replying, but turned to face May. “I’m testing my HCG levels.” She waited a moment for May’s reaction, before putting it in plainer terms. “I think I’m pregnant.”

May wasn’t sure what she had been expecting to hear, but that wasn’t it. A multitude of emotions flooded through her, and she closed her eyes as images swirled behind them. She opened them again immediately though, because this moment wasn’t about her. It was about Jemma FitzSimmons, alone in a lab at 7 am.

“Does Fitz know?” were her first words.

Jemma’s chin started shaking, and she brusquely wiped at her eyes with the back of her gloved hand.

“No. He’s got enough on his plate.”

“Jemma,” May said, reproachfully.

“It’s true!” Jemma said. “You know that he is Radcliffe’s pet. And despite what anyone says, Radcliffe finds him more useful than me. He is doing important things that I can’t even know about for my own safety, so how can I distract him from what he is doing with…with a baby?”

“He should be distracted, Jemma. Fitz loves you. You think he won’t prioritize you and a baby over his project with Radcliffe? You’re smarter than that, Jemma.  
“Please tell him,” May urged. “Don’t put work in front of happiness, or following your dreams of a family. Don’t give up what you want, because you think there will be time later.” She pulled back, swallowing hard. Her advice for Jemma had swerved into long repressed self-talk.

Jemma picked up on the subtext in May’s words, pieced together from months of conversation, when May had alluded to her previous life with Andrew, and the person she had been before Bahrain. She sat still, lips parted, not sure where to look.

“Did you…give up on something?” her voice was barely audible.

May hated the feelings that seeped from the cracks in her chest. She hated that Andrew was truly gone, and that she never got to explore a second chance with him. She hated every cruel thing that happened to her younger self to cause her to cocoon herself from further pain, and push people away. Who would she have been if she had been allowed to stay soft hearted?

“Tell him.” She said, suddenly exhausted by her unusual expression of words and emotion. “And…Tell me, once you find out.” She added.

Just then, there was a beeping from a nearby machine, and the computer screen in front of Jemma filled with sequences of letters and numerals that may as well have been hieroglyphs for all they made sense to May.

“Wait, this whole time, the test has been going on and I didn’t even know?” May asked, but was stopped short as Jemma launched herself at May, wrapping her arms around the older woman, and after a second of shock, she reciprocated the embrace, hands catching in the bottom of Jemma’s hair.

When Jemma pulled back, her cheeks were streaked with tears, and May cupped the scientist’s face in her hands.

“Is this good crying or bad crying?”

“Good,” Jemma sputtered, and her smile was like a beam of sunshine. “I’m going to be a mom, May.”

Melinda felt a broad smile break across her face. “I’m so happy for you.” She said, honestly. “Promise me you’ll tell him, though?”

Jemma nodded vigorously. “I will. Thank you for listening to me, Melinda, even when I was being fearful and irrational. “ She leant over to the computer again, and printed the results, holding the white sheet reverently by her finger tips.

“I’ll leave you be,” May said, touching Jemma’s shoulder. “Let me know how it all goes.”

Jemma nodded, before her gaze was drawn back to the test results, and May quietly slipped out of the lab, her heart full.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Turns out it is hard to find out the details of what an HCG blood test actually entails? WOOO bad science *sticks fist under chin and smiles*


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello friends, here is some angst and fluff!

Even though Leo FitzSimmons had only been awake for an hour or so, he was exhausted. Radcliffe’s voice would fade to a muffled drone in his ears as soon as he let his mind wander even an inch. In fact, the more he listened to Radcliffe’s plans, the more his heart sank. The man was enthusiastic, sure, but none of what he was saying seemed particularly time sensitive, and Leo was swiftly regretting his former assuredness that if Radcliffe wanted to talk to him at 7 am, then he must have a good reason to do so, so early into the day. Perhaps he was just excited about his newest findings, and hadn’t realized that his colleague wouldn’t share his passion for talking about transhumanism before the sun was even properly up. 

Fitz rested his chin on his palm, and let his mind go back to the last image he had of Jemma; The hurt on her face, the way her fingers encircled his wrist like she was drowning. He wished he could go back and change it, explain himself somehow, make it better. If only-

Radcliffe snapped his fingers in front of Fitz's face, making him jump in his chair.

“Hey!” the older man said. “Fitz? Did you catch any of what I just said?”

“I may have missed the last bit,” He admitted. “I zoned out for a second.”

“No kidding.” Radcliffe agreed. “Your eyes were all glazed over. What’s going on?” He tapped a finger against his temple.

Fitz sighed, scrubbing his hands over his face. Part of him didn’t want to confide in Radcliffe at all, while another part of him wanted to be brutally, searingly honest.

“Nex’ time maybe you won’t call me at 6:30,” He eventually said. “An’ by that I mean, don’ ever do that again.” He started to feel a bit bolder. “It comes down to basic boundary setting, you know? An’ I should have been more clear with you from the get go, but I’ll say it now. Mornings are off limits. In fact, mornings are often the only time Jemma an’ me get to see each other, so they are important to us. And I broke her trust this morning by…not standing up to you.” He realized. “And I left it really …bad between us. It wasn’t you’re fault for that, it was all mine. I’ve been…” Scared, he finished the sentence mentally. Ive been scared that something is wrong with her. He had used the excuse of Radcliffe calling so early to escape thinking about if Jemma was sick. Because if she was sick, he could lose her. True, that was the worst case scenario, but his mind had never had problem with jumping to those lengths before, had it? “I’ve been an ass. And I shouldn’t have left her.”

“Okay, wow.” Radcliffe said after a long painful pause. “Sooo…you’ve been holding that in all morning.”

Fitz exhaled shakily, only now realizing the tension he hand been storing in his shoulders and neck.

“To be honest, props to you Fitz, for realizing what you did. Boundaries are important in any professional workplace, and now that you’ve laid out yours, I’ll respect them. But for now…” Radcliffe searched the young man's face. “I think you should go see Jemma, and deal with whatever is going on between you two.”

Fitz nodded gratefully. Radcliffe was a good man, if a bit odd, and he gave the older man a slap on the shoulder as he left the room, an invigorated spring in his step.

 

He paused outside the door of their suite, and took a deep breath. He wasn’t sure if Jemma would be ready to forgive him for his behavior earlier that day, when he left her, even though he could tell that she was hurt and upset. Even thinking about it made him feel sick to his stomach. 

He opened the door, and Minnie danced around his ankles. He picked her up lightly, as her small form fit easily across the palm on his hand, and held her up to his chest.

“Hello, Sweet Pumpkin Pie of my Heart.” He murmured. When they had first acquired Minnie, he had sworn that he wouldn’t use silly, gushy nicknames for the cat, but that concept had been abandoned long ago. “Where is your Mum?” oh yeah, had he once said that he and Jemma weren’t Minnie’s parents and shouldn’t be referred to as such? Whoops.

He did a quick sweep of their apartment. Judging by discarded pyjamas in the hamper, the faint condensation not yet evaporated from the bathroom, and her shoes missing from the mat, Jemma had gotten ready for the day and left.

Fitz took several deep breaths to dissipate some growing anxiety about where Jemma might be, and more importantly, if she was still upset at him, and instead started preparing lunch for both of them. He wanted to make sure that it was something that wouldn’t upset Jemma’s stomach, and after flipping through their collection of recipes, decided on his mom’s recipe for matzo ball soup. He starting chopping vegetables, but was so absorbed in his work, he didn’t hear the door swing open.

 

The moment Jemma opened the door, she knew Fitz was back. She couldn’t see him, bit could hear him softly humming to himself as he had recently taken up doing, and the scrape and clatter of him moving around their small kitchen area.

She had been so hopeful as she left the lab, computer printout held carefully in her hands, and her newfound knowledge buzzing within her chest. It had almost distracted her from the confusing events of the morning, but now as she stared at Fitz’s shoes on the mat, she was reminded that all was not well between them. For all that their relationship was strong and better than ever, historically, when they had fallouts they took a while to recover from. 

She shuddered, her memories going back to the events after his accident. The not-talking, the miscommunication, the hurt and loneliness. And then just as they had gotten back to normal, those six terrible months on Maveth… what new horror awaited them, to test them, threaten to tear them apart? They had promised each other that they would never let themselves be separated again, but it didn’t account for outside forces that could shatter their lives without warning.

And it was no longer just the two of them anymore…Her hand ghosted over her stomach which now held a growing secret.

She was still standing by the door, trapped inside her mind when Minnie skittered across the room to come greet her, with a distinctive chirrup Jemma had come to recognize as her ‘Hello, You’re back!’ noise. Jemma crouched down to let Minnie bump her face against her palm, and scratched the young cat behind the ears. When she straightened up, Fitz was standing in the doorway of their kitchen, apron wrapped around his waist. He held a stalk of celery in one hand, and it dripped water onto the floor.

“Oh,” Jemma said, her voice sounding strange in her ears. “I wasn’t expecting you to be back so soon.”

Fitz set down the celery and wiped his hands on the apron, which protected his pale blue button-down and trousers. “I went to see Radcliffe, but felt bad about what happened this morning, and left early.”

“Oh?” Jemma was unable to keep the ice out of her voice, no matter how she tried to tone down her hurt. She hadn’t come into the conversation planning on getting upset, but her emotions flared to life despite her intent. “So you recognize that something happened this morning?” 

Fitz sighed, pinching his nose before straightening, hands on hips. ‘Are you trying to punish me, Jem’? I just admitted that I made a mistake. I came back to try and make it better!”

“Are you punishing me?” Jemma cried. “ Because that’s the only reason I can think of that you would act the way you did.” 

“What? I left, Jemma, but it wasn’t personal. I left because I thought that if Radcliffe was callin’ so early, there had to be a good reason. I though’ it was an emergency.” His accent grew thicker with emotion. “Just because I left this morning, it wasn’t me rejecting you. I just…”

“You weren’t rejecting me? Leo, you were barely able to kiss me.”

“That doesn’t mean I don’t love you!" Fitz insisted. “Its got nothing to do with that.”

There was a potent pause, both of them breathing hard. 

“Why didn’t you want to kiss me?” Jemma repeated, but quietly this time. Her rage had burnt itself out, and she wanted nothing more to have Fitz hold her, and comfort her.

“You wouldn’t understand. It’s silly.” He muttered.

Jemma crossed the room, and took both his hands in hers. “Leo,” she said, heart aching. “I might not understand but I would rather not understand something, than have you feel like you have to keep it from me.”

He looked down at their joined hands, and ran his thumb over her knuckles. He took a shaky breath and spoke.

“I don’ like getting sick.” he confessed. “I hate the feeling of throwing up. It reminds me of…” he paused. “No’ being able to breathe. An’ I didn’t want to catch whatever has been making you throw up so much.”

Jemma didn’t know how to respond to his confession right away. She brought their hands up to her face and gently kissed his hands. It wasn’t because of any fracture in their relationship that he had refrained from kissing her, but instead because of triggered memories of their accident and his drowning.

“No, I understand, Leo. Of course I do.” Did he think that she was a stranger to odd triggers, too? She had not set foot in a swimming pool or automated car-wash since the accident, and still went out of her way to avoid elevators or anything involving desert imagery. Of course she understood.

She felt a sudden pang of guilt for kissing him on the lips, now knowing why he was avoiding doing so. Had he been worried all morning that he was going to come down with some stomach bug? Non-existent stomach bug, she thought, suddenly very aware of the folded paper in her pocket. But before she made any revelations…

“Im sorry for any anxiety I caused you. I was scared, but that’s no excuse for what I did. I was being selfish.” She said, cheeks hot with remorse.

“Hey,” Fitz tipped her chin up so she could see his eyes. “I’m not mad. I love you, and just because I didn’t kiss you one time, that doesn’t mean I love you any less.”

Jemma pulled him close, wrapping her arms around his chest and resting her face against his shoulder. They stood like that for a few good seconds, swaying gently, before Jemma pulled back with a cryptic smile.

“You can kiss me all you want now, because I'm not sick.” 

Fitz’s eyebrows furrowed. ‘What do you mean?” he asked. “What part of you bein’ hunched over the toilet for the past few days indicates in any way that you’re not sick?” he felt a bit nauseous at the memory, and had to take a few deep breaths to settle his stomach.

Jemma pulled the folded sheet of paper from her pocket, and unfurling it, handed it to him, before leaning back to gauge his reaction.

Fitz looked bewildered at first, but at her insistence, began to read. “Human chorionic gonadotropin…” he mumbled aloud, before inhaling sharply, and looking back up at Jemma with wide eyes. “Does this mean what I think it does? Are you…are we…?”

“I’m pregnant,” Jemma confirmed, letting her face break into the sunny smile she had been suppressing.

Fitz began to cry; tears rolling freely down his stubbled cheeks. “We’re going to have a baby!” he croaked, before gently cupping Jemma’s face in his hands and kissing her. He kissed her lips, long and tender, before moving to her eyelids, her cheeks, and the tip of her nose. She kept giggling, and Fitz thought it was the sweetest sound he had ever heard.

He dropped to his knees, fingertips reverently ghosting over her t-shirt covered stomach, before tenderly planting a kiss right below Jemma’s belly button, and she looked down at him fondly, fingers combing softly through his curls.

“I’m going to be a Da. Your Da.” He murmured to her belly, and Jemma soaked in the moment, letting it sear into her mind like a photograph. She wanted to hold onto this moment, and never forget it; add it to her mental scrapbook of good things. 

“I’m never leavin’ again.” Fitz said, on his feet now. He rested his forehead against hers. “I’m never going to make you feel abandoned again; make you feel like I don’ love and care for you. ” He promised. ‘You’re my life, Jemma, “he placed a hand on her stomach. “And this little bean inside you is too, now.”

“Did you already come up with a pet name for our baby?” Jemma teased, before sobering at the sincerity of his words and the emotion in his face. She ran her fingertips over his cheekbones, before settling into the familiar cradle of his arms.

“We’re a family.” She agreed, as she felt his heartbeat against her cheek.

"Yeah," He said, as Minnie twined between their ankles. "We are."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave feedback, because it means a lot to me! <3


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fitz and Jemma discuss their fears about parenthood.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapters is basically?? just crying whoops.

Jemma balanced her tablet in the crook of her arm, her hands full with a mug of tea and a plate of her favorite biscuits. She curled up on the couch, pulling a throw over herself with a sound of contentment. Despite the fatigue and nausea that had now become her everyday companions, she had forced herself to spend a full day working in the lab.

She wasn’t going to let the normal side effects of growing a tiny person inside her interfere with her time in the lab. However, if she did find herself looking forward to the end of the day when she could put her feet up and fall asleep, surely that was to be expected. Fitz had said that she could take things easy if she wanted, but the fact was that Jemma _didn’t_ want to. She wanted to be as normal as possible; for life to go on as it had before.

She knew how hard is was going to be balancing parenthood and a job in the sciences, as both sides could look down on her for trying to do both at once. Already, she was preparing. The day after she had found out she was pregnant, she had made a list of peer reviews studies about child raising, while Fitz ordered half a dozen books online. She had argued with him that many of them were full of fearmongering and worst case scenarios and that they would only bring unnecessary negativity into pregnancy, but FItz retorted that she already knew somewhat about babies by merit of growing up female, but that he knew literally nothing about pregnancy and that he had to start somewhere.

While Jemma was reading, Minnie jumped up on the foot of the couch with a chirrup, before carefully walking her way up Jemma’s body. Minnie kneaded the soft throw, purring mightily before curling up in a ball on Jemma’s stomach. Jemma briefly entertained the idea that Minnie was somehow aware of her pregnancy, considering the way she consistently seemed to gravitate towards snuggling with her stomach.

However, at 8 weeks, Jemma was only barely showing, so unless there was some way that Minnie could sense her changing hormones, it was more likely that Jemma was just projecting her heightened emotions, which were already proving themselves problematic. Earlier that day, she had found herself snapping at a well-meaning lab tech, and swallowing back tears of frustration when an experiment kept failing.

She tried to focus on what she was reading, but her eyelids were getting heavier and heavier, and the couch was so soft…

She woke to sensation of Minnie being lifted off her body, and she squinted upwards to see Fitz holding Minnie with outstretched arms, like the cat was a bomb about to go off.

“Hello,” She mumbled sleepily, blinking away the fogginess that came with napping so late in the afternoon.

Fitz didn’t respond, but just stood there looking nervous.

“Promise you won’t do the cat litter anymore?” he blurted, apropos of nothing.

Jemma rubbed her face and pushed herself up until she was sitting as she tried to make sense of what he was asking.

“Yeah, of-of course,” she agreed. She still wasn’t sure why he was offering to take up the worst part of cat ownership, but she wasn’t arguing.

Fitz was now holding Minnie in a more comfortable manner, but she still looked put out at being separated from a warm, sleeping Jemma, and Minnie huffed in annoyance.

“I recently found out, like 15-minutes-ago recently-“ Fitz continued, “that cats can carry a parasite that is spread to humans through their _shit,_ and while it is normally harmless to the average person with a good immune system, it can be dangerous to people with bad immune systems or who are pregnant.” His hand reached up to unconsciously fiddle with his earlobe. “That’s you! Were you aware of this?”

“Oh, yeah.” She nodded. “I did an entire presentation on it, back at the Academy,” She reminded him with a fond smile. “It really is quite a fascinating paras-“

“No, it’s not fascinating,” He insisted. “That something as…as innocent and innocuous as a simple house cat,” He gestured to Minnie, who was still in his arms. “Could post such a danger to-“

“Babe,” Jemma could see that he was getting significantly distressed, and she patted the couch beside her as an invitation for him to sit beside her.

“Honestly? You don’t need to fret.” She said in what she hoped was a calming manner, after the way she had practically _bragged_ about how much she found the parasite interesting. “It’s more likely than not that I already have antibodies against it, darling. I had cats growing up, remember? _Farm cats_. If anything, I would have contracted it then, and my body would have dealt with it. The only risk is if you are actively infected during your pregnancy, and I have specifically not touched her litter for that reason. We’re going to be ok.”

Fitz exhaled loudly and nodded, dropping his face into his hands, sinking into the couch.

“It’s not really about the toxo- the tox- the freaky cat parasite.” He stumbled over his words, his emotional distress tripping his tongue. “There are so many small dangers everywhere.” He continued. “For example, I could be doing something like…making you lunch. I would be making you a sandwich, say, and I I would put cold cuts, or soft cheese on it, because I only just learned that you aren’t allowed to eat those kinds of things anymore.” His hands were shaking and he sounded perilously close to tears. “I don’t know enough about any of this! I don’t know how to….keep you safe.” He admitted.

Jemma shook her head fiercely. “It’s not a competition of who knows more! I’m only learning all these things as we go, too. We’ll work together to keep this baby safe and healthy, but you have to have some confidence in yourself, my love. You’re doing fine so far, and you don’t have to do this alone.”

She paused, seeming like she had left something unsaid. After a moment, she spoke.

“Can I suggest something, though?” She asked. “Will you do something for me?”

“Anything.” He responded instantly, almost before she had had time to fully complete her sentence.

Jemma shifted in her seat on the couch, so she was fully facing him.

“Will you talk to your therapist, next time you see him? About…feeling like you won’t be able to be a good dad, or that you won’t be able to protect us. I think there is a normal level of anxiety to be expected in this sort of situation, but considering what you’ve…what we’ve been though I don’t think..." She couldn’t find the words to say.

“I’m worried about you.” She realized. “We’ve been through enough and we deserve to be happy and not have fear touching every damn part of our lives.”

When she finally looked up from where she had been twisting her fingers in her lap, he was looking at her earnestly, and if she had expected some sort of pushback against her suggestion, there was none. Instead, he only nodded slowly.

“I actually have been thinking the same thing.” He said. “And I want to do it. Because I don’t think I can go on like this; Feeling so scared all the time. I can’t stop these thoughts, I can’t-“

Jemma pulled him into her arms, and his shoulders shook as he finally voiced the fears he had been holding inside.

She murmured “You’re safe, I’m safe, and our baby is safe. We’re going to be okay,” and repeated it like a prayer, hoping that if she said it enough it would be true.

His shuddering shoulders gradually relaxed, and he ended up laying across Jemma’s lap as she kept one grounding hand on his shoulder and another softly stroking through his hair.

“Our next doctor’s appointment is next week,” she finally said after several minutes of quiet. “This time we get to hear the heart beat.”

“Our baby’s heart.” He repeated and smiled in that awestruck way he had whenever he was reminded of the reality of their child, but his smile quickly faded again, not without Jemma noticing.

“I’m going to get better, Jem.” He promised. “I’m going to deal with this anxiety because we’re going to have or hands full and its not fair for you to have to deal with two babies.” He let out a humorless laugh.

“I hate it when you talk about yourself like this,” Jemma’s forehead creased. “My love, you’re not weak.” She emphasized. “Time and time again you’ve only shown how strong you are, and you have to give yourself some credit. We’ve gone through more trauma than some people experience in a lifetime. I think it’s incredibly brave to have been though such pain and seen what a world we live in and still-“ Her eyes were bright as she cupped his stubbled cheek in one hand, not looking away.

“-Still believe that we deserve happiness and a normal life. To believe that we aren’t too broken to love each other, or a baby.”

He was crying again, silent tears sliding down his nose. Minnie curled up tight against him, like a barnacle; like an anchor. She could sense his distress but didn’t know how to help him other than just _being_.

In time, their breathing slowed and became even again, and tears dried.

Fitz pushed himself up from where he had basically crumbled into Jemma’s arms.

“Enough of this sadness,” he said, more to himself than to  anyone, and pulling tissues from a box on the coffee table, gave one to Jemma and one to himself.

“We can still have a good evening.” Jemma agreed, and stretched her legs out over the side of the couch. Her stomach growled and Fitz realized that they had been talking so long that they had passed the usual time they ate their supper.

“What should we make?” he wondered aloud.

“Um…we?” Jemma wiggled herself further into the couch cushions, a mischievous smile on her lips. “I’m so cozy here though…”

 “Oh, I see.” He said faux seriously, as Jemma placed Minnie beside her in her couch-nest.

“I’ll pick a movie to watch and you can find something for supper?” Jemma already had the TV remote in her hand. Watching TV as they ate together was a staple of their relationship, dating back from their academy years. It was a ritual imbued with as much comfort and familiarity as an old t shirt, and Fitz nodded thankfully.

Soon they had steaming plates of reheated leftovers in front of them, and the opening credits of a movie playing in front of them. Jemma leaned back against Fitz’s chest, and he rested on hand against the tiny swell of her bump. He kissed the top of her head, and in his mind, repeated the words she had spoken to him earlier.

_‘We’ll be ok. We’ll be ok. We’ll be ok.’_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eeeeeeey looks whos back! (Its me)  
> Ok, but seriously, thank you to everyone who has stuck with this fic, through thin and....mostly thin. I could beat myself up abt my abysmal updating habits, but i think ill go work on the next chapters instead. <3  
> Please leave feedback!


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